I just received an email from a great lady who asked, "Wonder if you could share what folks can say to let you know that they're thinking about the two of you during these next few weeks of IVF..."
First, I totally applaud that she asks . . . that is one of the best things a friend can do. If you are unsure in any situation in a friendship, just ask. Don't be so timid that you are totally muzzled with fear that you will say the wrong thing.
What to say when you want share your concern and be supportive:
Simply state that you are thinking about the couple. Do it through an email, phone call, or note in the mail.
Share any kind of message from the heart such as:
- You are in our prayers (or however you feel this is best said, remember it should come from the heart)
- We care about you.
- Hang in there.
- Good luck!
- We love you.
Share something positive. If you inclined to say more, share something from your life or something funny. It is nice to be reminded that there is life outside of fertility struggles.
Offer up a daily life support if you feel really impressed to take on additional action. This can range from offering to bring a meal, offer that you can give rides/run an errand, offer childcare (if appropriate), or some other creative way to decrease the daily life stress that we all deal with but can become crippling when you add on the stress of a fertility procedure.
BTW, Thanks for asking.
I have been more candid on these posts than I ever thought I would have the strength to be. Talking about infertility is awkward at best. I appreciate how lovingly my words have been received.
