I've been meaning to write you all week. I've had some concerns I wanted to share with you. First, you must realize that I have a very nervous constitution and tummy right now. After that realization, the following will make sense.
- Please refrain from allowing animals to vomit obscenely, and repeatedly, on my front steps. Even more grateful I will be if the vomiting did not include raw and recognizable animal parts. (To my readers, the offending animal was not Twiggy. She prefers live animal gifts and after this week, I much appreciate her version.)
- Please refrain from publicizing any spider fights in my presence. I don't care how long I need to drape my slovenly being over the porcelain god of latrines, ANYTIME I see spiders fighting, especially if one of them is a menacing looking creature that looks like it preys on toddlers, I will shriek and kill all creatures with exoskeletons in my path. I must note though that my illogical fear will keep me from disposing of said carcases, and I will just avoid THAT bathroom until Erik can dispose of the remains.
- Please refrain from allowing any flying insects into my son's room. I am especially wary of stinging insects after one roosted in his room this week, escaping many attempts on his life. Erik finally killed it.
- Please refrain from, well, smelling bad. That would help immensely. It doesn't have to be forever . . . let's just say you can start smelling bad in about a month.
I do appreciate the rain, the sunny days, the flowers, and insects when they are outside. I appreciate the rocks, especially as Everett builds his own appreciation and rock collection. I even don't mind the squirrels very much these days.
I appreciate your sympathy and attention in this manner.
A Mom
